EverRealm: A LitRPG Novel (Level Dead Book 1) Page 9
Agility: 85%
Magic: 15%
Armor: leather, no bonus
Coin: 200 gold pieces, 155 silver pieces, 0 copper pieces
Inventory: Long bow with 14 regular arrows, 4 magical. 1 long sword of Breaking (Level 16). The Dark Blade, inactive (level unknown). 2 tunics. 1 pair of breeches. 1 hooded cloak. 1 satchel with 1 wine skin, empty.
Hey! I leveled up by two levels! Nice!
A good night’s sleep and some food, lots of food, would bring the stats back to 100%. Except for magic. That never went above 15% for me. Some Rangers could up their magic percentage, since apparently Rangers can be good with certain types of magic, but I just didn’t care enough to do it.
“I could have you thrown in the dungeon, you know,” Ming said when I finally approached the throne while the others did their saves.
“Yep,” I said. “But you won’t. That’d be a dick move.”
“Let me see the Dark Blade,” Ming said.
“Only if you promise not to take it from me,” I said. “It wasn’t easy to get.”
“That ain’t true at all,” Coz said as he finished saving and joined me at the foot of the steps. “Considering who you took it from, it was pretty easy. You kind of just picked it up off the ground.”
“After getting the shit burned out of my hand,” I said and held up my gloved hand. Not a mark. “Well, it was a magical burn and hurt. A lot.”
“I am well versed in the mechanics of the Dark Blade,” Ming said. He held out his hand.
“You promise to give it back?” I said.
“Yes, Steve, I promise to give it back,” Ming said, sounding as offended as he could.
I hesitated then ascended the stone steps and placed the sword in his hands. He hefted it, feeling the weight, then nodded and looked at me.
“And the Dark Enforcer?” Ming asked. “Was his death an honorable one?”
Coz cleared his throat and walked away from the throne steps, whistling some tune.
“Okay, so here’s the thing,” I said and told him what had happened with the Dark Enforcer.
To his credit, and despite being seriously drunk, Ming tried to keep his composure. But too much wine always wins in the end, and about halfway through the story, he was so red in the face I thought he was gonna have a heart attack or something.
“Your instincts to avoid this Domain have always been correct,” Ming said as he gave me back the sword. “You are no more good for this land than this land is for you. The havoc you have brought down upon us…”
He sighed and put his head in his hands.
I waited for a long while then moved closer. He was snoring.
“Jesus, he’s passed out,” I said. “Should we call his servants and have him put to bed?”
“Nah,” Trish said. “He does it all the time.”
“You aren’t afraid he’s going to piss himself or throw up?” I asked.
“That’s when we do call the servants, bro,” Holo said. “They handle all of that.”
“Is he always like this or is this only because of the undead problem?” I asked.
“He isn’t usually this bad,” Trish said. “But he has been known to get his drink on. I wouldn’t call him a lush or anything…” She laughed. “Yeah, I would. He’s a fucking lush in this Domain.”
“Can you blame him?” Coz asked, holding out an empty goblet for a servant to fill. He smiled and waited, took a sip when full, then continued. “The guy is so wound up back in the real world. He lives alone on some massive estate with nothing but reminders of his family and the wealth he had that means jack shit now. He’s bound to be a bit depressed, right?”
“Yeah,” Kip said.
“Come on, we’ve all lost family,” I snapped. I was having a hard time feeling too sorry for Ming. Must have been hard to get to stay at his home all safe and secure while the world burned around him. Yeah, real hard.
“And we all get drunk when we can,” Coz said, raising his goblet to me. “Come on, dude. Sit your ass down and eat. We’re gonna need the energy.”
While I’d been shocking Ming with my story, servants had set up a long dining table and loaded it with so much food and drink it looked like it was bowing in the middle. Everyone was seated and filling themselves to capacity. Trish waved a massive smoked turkey leg at me.
“It really isn’t fucking fair that you get the Dark Blade,” she said around a mouthful of meat.
“I know, right?” Coz said just before downing his entire goblet of wine. He belched. “I’d rather Holo had it than Steve.”
“Yeah,” Kip said.
“You guys suck,” I said.
I took a seat and loaded a plate with whatever was at hand. I wasn’t even paying attention and I didn’t really care. As long as I could pour a ton of gravy on it then I was good and happy.
“No, I mean it,” Trish said. “It isn’t fair. Do you know what a sorceress of my caliber could do with that blade? I could probably take down Jeremy and his entire undead army by myself.”
I had just taken a bite of turkey with oh-so-much gravy. The turkey lodged in my throat, the gravy refusing to do its job and lubricate the meat. Kip smacked me on the back so I didn’t die.
When I caught my breath, I asked, “I’m sorry, but did you say undead army?”
“Yeah?” Kip asked.
Coz turned and regarded Trish with great interest, his eyes locked onto her while he sipped his wine.
“Do tell, Trish dear,” Coz said in a horrible British accent. “I am most interested in this undead army you speak of.”
“You guys didn’t know?” Trish asked us, knowing full well we were totally in the dark about any undead army. “Damn.”
We waited. Trish took her sweet ass time getting to the details, eating a few mouthfuls of food before setting her fork down and smiling at all of us like we were nice little kids waiting for mommy to speak. I was close to punching her and I wasn’t the only one. Holo started to growl low in his throat. I placed a hand on the back of his neck to calm him down.
“Goddamn, I expected one of you to snap,” Trish said and laughed.
“Trish, love,” Coz said in a very sweet voice. “Tell us what the hell is going on, or I swear to God, I’ll beat you to death with this here scrumptious turkey leg.”
He brandished one at her and Kip joined in, shaking his own.
“Yeah,” Kip said.
“Wouldn’t want you to waste that good meat,” Trish said. She drank some wine and settled back in her chair. “Jeremy has been busy.”
With a wave of her hand, she brought up a silver cloud of mist. The mist began to shimmer and form into an image. I was sure that on her heads-up display she was choosing a couple of different spells, combining them together to bring us the vision in the mist.
“That there is the Valley of Regrets,” Trish said. “Jeremy has been crossing the land, turning everyone he comes in contact with into undead, and sending them to that valley.”
I started to speak, so did Coz, but she held up a hand to stop us.
“Hold on,” she said. “There’s more.”
She flicked two fingers and the view in the mist changed. It zoomed in on a village to show a laughing Jeremy. Glowing eyes, and very undead, but laughing. Men and women screamed and ran, dodging this way and that as undead chased them down. Many of the villagers were ripped apart, their bodies nothing but food for the always hungry undead. But quite a few were left intact. After several seconds of convulsions, and a too-short amount of stillness, the villagers came back, ready to start their new, undead lack of life.
“This is only a fraction of what he’s accomplished,” Trish said. “He’s using his elven speed, and a few magic items he has in his inventory, to transport himself all over EverRealm so he can build his ranks.”
“He’s using?” Coz asked. “You mean he’s thinking this through?”
“It takes thought and planning to build an army, Coz,” Trish said. “Fucking duh.”r />
“Except he’s dead,” Coz said. “Or undead. Whatever. The undead don’t think. They chase, they eat, they repeat. No thinking.”
“The undead in our world, sure,” Trish said. “But we ain’t in our fucking world, are we?”
“But he’s not an NPC,” Coz said. “He’s like us. He should follow the rules of our world. His brain should be mush.”
“What rules, bro?” Holo barked. “All bets are off. We’ve stepped off the cliff and into the ocean of holy shit.”
“Trish is right,” I said. “Back me up, Kip.”
“Yeah,” Kip said mournfully.
“When we found Jeremy, he was different,” I said. ‘“Not undead different, but completely different. The quantum matrix did something to his brain. It must have reworked it to fit some scenario.”
“The Saga of the Lich King,” Ming said from the throne, surprising all of us.
“Oh, snap,” Coz said and slumped into his chair.
“Yeah,” Kip responded, looking even worse than before.
“Come on, Ming,” Trish said. “I know I’ve been playing it up here, but even you can’t fucking believe that to be true.”
“It is true,” Ming said. The front of his robes was soaked wet with drool and his skin was a sickly green pallor, but he managed to stand up without falling down the steps, so good on him. “I knew it the second you first showed me what he’d become, Trish. It is the Saga of the Lich King.”
Holo gave a disgusted grunt and grabbed a steak bone off the table. He walked over to a corner and started gnawing away, his back to us all. That wasn’t good.
“Would someone please tell me what the Saga of the Lich King is?” I asked.
“Dude,” Coz said. “Really?”
“I can’t even,” Trish said.
“The Saga of the Lich King is the first module that EverRealm had,” Ming said. “Back when this game was pencil and paper and funny-looking dice.”
“Module?” I asked.
“Module,” Ming said. “Booklets. Printed booklets that let the Game Master run preplanned adventures for the players. These were players sitting at the table with him.”
“Or her,” Trish said.
“Or her, but most likely a him,” Ming continued. “The Saga of the Lich King was the first and only module to sell well at all. After that, the game died away, overshadowed by Dungeons & Dragons. I have a copy of the module in my estate. It is framed and sits front and center in my living room. A family heirloom.”
“Except it was never incorporated into the quantum version of EverRealm,” Coz said, his voice hopeful. “Right, Ming? It’s a legend amongst players, but no one has ever been able to activate the module within EverRealm. Thousands of adventures and quests, but not one time did the Saga of the Lich King come up.”
“Until now,” Trish said.
“Yeah,” Kip agreed.
“Why would the system wait?” I asked. “Why would it hold back this module and only let it happen when an undead Jeremy came on the scene?”
“Ah, yes, that is the question, is it not?” Ming said. “Let us consult the Oracle for the answer.”
Everyone except me groaned.
“The Oracle?” I asked.
Sixteen
Turned out that the Oracle was Ming’s bubby.
Ming wasn’t Jewish or anything, but apparently in his family, the grandmas were called bubby. And that was the Oracle we went to see.
But, before we could see her, we had to go on this mini quest of our own. We never left the castle, but I swear we walked about thirty damn miles before we got to the tower where the Oracle was held.
I always thought an oracle was like a talking stone or plant or some pond you went to where you made a wish and you were given an answer to whatever question you had. I voiced this to the others and was chastised thoroughly. I mean, they were brutal. Even Holo. Turns out I was thinking of a “temple” and the oracle is housed in the “temple.” They let me have it and didn’t stop until we’d ascended the tower (temple?) where the Oracle was kept.
It was a long flight of stairs, let me tell you.
We stood outside a simple wooden door and Ming knocked three times. He smiled at us, the mini quest having sobered him up a good deal, and tapped his foot as we waited. When there was no answer, he knocked again.
“Bubby? It’s, uh…Paulie boy,” Ming said, the last words almost a whisper.
“Eh? Who’s that?” an old woman’s voice called from the other side of the door.
“Did he just say Paulie Boy?” I asked.
“Yeah,” Kip said.
“Hush,” Trish said, taking things way too serious.
I mean, come on, Ming just said his name was Paulie Boy.
“Bubby, it’s me,” Ming said.
“You? You who?” She cackled. “You who. Yoohoo!”
“Dude,” Coz said. “We don’t have time to deal with your bubby.”
“Technically, she is not my bubby,” Ming said. “My bubby died when I was twenty-three. But, Grandfather had her personality immortalized within EverRealm so that we could visit her when we so chose. The game, refusing to allow frivolous sentimentality like that, gave her the role of Oracle. It was fitting since she filled that role in real life, as well. Perhaps with not so much omniscience, but she was a very perceptive woman.”
The door was flung open and a hunched-over old woman was standing there, her face upturned and beaming.
“Paulie Boy!” she cried and grabbed Ming’s arm, yanking him down so she could pinch his cheek with her other hand. “I thought I heard you! Why didn’t you knock?”
“I did knock, Bubby,” Ming said, gently pushing her hands away. “You even answered when I called to you.”
“I did?” she said and her eyes glazed over for a second. They returned to a happy brightness almost instantly. “Oh, dear me, I thought you were the rats. You know, Paulie Boy, this tower has rats. Fierce little buggers. I told you that last time and you still haven’t called the exterminator.”
“Rats?” Holo asked, shaking slightly at the thought.
“There are no rats, Bubby,” Ming said. “I banished them a few decades ago, remember?”
Again with the glazed look returning to bright happiness.
“Oh, yes, how silly of me,” Bubby said. She glanced past Ming at us and frowned. “Paulie Boy? Who are these strangers? You know I don’t like it when you bring people around before telling me.”
“They’re not strangers, Bubby,” Ming said. “You remember Trish, Coz, Kip, and Holo.”
“Oh, yes, of course!” Bubby said, nodding vigorously. “But who is this one? Never seen him before.”
“No, you have not,” Ming agreed. “This is Steve. He’s Holo’s friend.”
“I’m his owner,” I said.
“Racist bastard,” Holo said.
“Jesus, calm down,” I said. “I was kidding.”
“Torgo,” Bubby said. “The racist’s name is Torgo.”
“Dammit, Ming,” I snapped and whirled on him. “You promised.”
“Yes, well, we all must find our fun where we can,” he said.
He wiggled his fingers and my display came up.
Character name has been changed to Steve. Do you agree with change?
“Yes,” I said.
Change is made. Welcome, Steve!
Bubby eyed me. “Gonna be watching you, Steve.”
She began to pat her hair, which was silver gray and put up in a severe bun. It reminded me of Sandra.
“Uh, we forgot to get Sandra,” I said, hoping to switch attention off me.
“No, you didn’t,” Sandra called from inside the tower room. “I’m right here.”
“I gave her a heads up,” Trish said. She wiggled her fingers at me. “Magic.”
“Ha ha,” I said.
“Are you a friend of Sandy, Steve?” Bubby asked. “Well, that’s different. Come in, come in. We’re having tea and cookies. I made the cookies
fresh this morning.”
“Bubby, you don’t have a kitchen up here,” Ming said.
The glazed-to-brightness look.
“Well, someone made cookies this morning,” Bubby said. “Because I have a lot of cookies. Come in now. Stop standing on my doorstep like vagabonds.”
She turned and shuffled her way over to a small table where a chair was pushed back. We followed her in and I saw Sandra sitting at the table, a cup of tea and a saucer in her hands. She smiled at us and I couldn’t help but smile back. She was the first good thing I’d seen since showing up in EverRealm. Sandra’s character was a Level 275 Priestess. A holy warrior that could heal and kill with equal skill.
Goddam she was beautiful. I almost stopped breathing. EverRealm seemed to relax that fearful look she always had.
She wore a dress of simple cloth, dyed a dark green. It fitted her nicely. Around her waist was a leather belt that held a bunch of small pouches and one good-sized dagger. I knew that in the pouches were all kinds of herbs and potions. The dagger was charmed so that it killed only enemies and healed all friends. If she stabbed you with it. That part wasn’t much fun.
Sandra caught me looking and my face burned red, so I turned to look out the one window in the tower room, pretending to be interested in the view. It was a nice view, so it wasn’t total bullshit. You could see a quarter of EverRealm from the window, or someone said as we’d climbed the tower stairs. They may have been making it up to pass the time.
“Who wants tea?” Bubby asked.
“We are good, Bubby,” Ming said. “And we are in a bit of a hurry.”
“Are you now?” Bubby replied and looked at Sandra. “Is this true, Sandy?”
“I am afraid so, Bubby,” Sandra said. “There is a bad man that has invaded EverRealm and we must find him.”
“A bad man, hmmmm?” Bubby mused. “While I cannot choose sides, being an Oracle is a neutral job, I am not fond of bad men roaming the land. They destroy things that are not meant to be destroyed and it takes so long to repair the damage.”
“That is exactly why we are here, Bubby,” Ming said. “We need to speak to you of the Saga of the Lich King.”
Bubby gasped and made a warding gesture.
“Oh, then this man is bad indeed,” she exclaimed.